OK, so I have this flare in my foot going on. Of course it is my left foot and I can't drive since my cars are manual transmission. So this flare....I can't move the toes on my foot and my whole foot is way swollen and painful. Can't really walk on it so I am using crutches and getting really big arm muscles lol.
So I keep having this dream that I wake up in the morning and that I can move all my toes and there is no swelling and everything is fine. As soon as I turn to wake up Danny and tell him the flare is gone, *poooooof* I wake up and realize it was all just a dream. Sigh. This just really tells me that I am very impatient waiting out this flare and most likely in some denial about it. I figure that I am tired of resting and keeping my foot elevated and just want it done with. Flares really suck and not only a drain physically, but also emotionally. I could ony do so much before I flared again, and now I can do even less. Which really leaves me feeling like I can't take care of my family the way I should. They should not be taking care of me like this, but vice versa. There are times I feel like I am a burden. I know I am not, but that doesn't avoid feeling the way I do. My family is awesome at accepting that this is what life has handed us and we do what we have to do to make our family work. My girls...bless their hearts...all they know is my arthritis and working around it. They are awesome at helping out around the house.
There is a bright side to this flare. We have the mattress in the living room so I am comfortable so me and Danny get a lot of extra cuddle time and ummm other time lol. Wooohooo for me!!!!!
Well, let's hope this flare is gone soon. Or I am gonna look really funny with these huge arm muscles lol.
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1 comment:
Wish you could just hibernate like a bear into that dreamland until the flare passes?
I don't know about you, but I think I resent the emotional drain even more than the physical drain from a flare. But then, emotional and physical energy are probobly not as separate inside us as they are when we talk about them as different things.
With those arm muscles you're going to look great in your clothes when summer gets here.
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